Terrible Tohs

Because 4 is better than 1

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A Timely Meet-The-Parents Session

The last weekend was packed with activities, the key highlight (at least to me) was the half-yearly Meet-The-Parents session at Summer’s school.

We are usually quite chill about such sessions, having attended more than 4 or 5 before. Our relaxed disposition is anchored on 2 thoughts:

1. Our expectations are not high, we don’t expect the teachers to transform Summer into a child prodigy.

2. I don’t think we will ever pull her out from the school, unless something drastic like fighting or bullying occurs.

3. We understand that teachers have tougher jobs than most of us.

So all in all, our sessions with the school are more of being notified of how Summer is progressing rather than questioning the teachers on how they can do better for my kid. The teachers must love us for that.

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Breakfast place before going to school

Anyhow some takeaways from the session, which was attended by Mama Toh 90% of the time because I was chasing Summer and Zavier for almost the whole full hour:

1. The only thing below average on her report card (yes this is a real thing for 4 year olds) is her inability to ask questions/talk at appropriate times. This came as no surprise to me but I think Mama Toh was slightly affected by the fact that her perfect daughter had a flaw in her report card. The teacher said she could rarely finish a book without Summer asking questions every sentence. Yup, sounds like my girl there.

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Here's the inquisitive explorer

2. Unhappy kids are real. Everyone thinks that kids are always happy and loved, but even in a noisy bustling school like Summer’s, unhappy kids exist. Her teacher was just sharing with us that she can tell that Summer is a happy kid and is loved at home because she always draws happy pictures and chooses bright colours, whilst there are other kids who only draw sad/angry faces and only color in black. It’s sad guys, please please don’t let that happen to your kids.

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From this photo I am very afraid Zavier will grow up drawing sad faces crying HELP ME

3. Zavier’s future teacher has a fitness regime ready for her already. When we first brought Zavier to the school, one of the teachers who will be in-charged of the youngest playgroup kids cooed over him and asked when he is joining (tentatively September). I literally saw her coo slowly transform into a fearful smile when she saw how I had to run after Zavier the whole hour there. Is this boy permanently on caffeine? Good luck to the teacher!

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Not stopping even at 9.30pm

The Parenting Task Which Drains My Patience

Surprising even to myself, my patience level is quite high when it comes to managing my kids. For an impatient man that is quite a feat.

Summer waking me up at 6.45am on a Saturday to request that I play her Little Pony Castle with her? Not a problem.

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Yawns

Singing ‘Wheels On The Bus’ for a world record 15 minutes straight on bus trip? Not a problem.

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Nailed it

Stopping every 10 metres on a walk from Marina Square to Raffles Place to stop Summer’s monkeying around? Not a problem as well.

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Monkey in action

In fact, all the above happened in a 3 hour span on Saturday morning. So I think I can say for a fact that when it comes to handling kids, I lean towards taking a patient approach.

However, I might have found my kryptonite. Whilst I admit there are a few tasks which make me lose my patience once in a while, namely making the kids sleep and feeding them during meal times, this one takes the cake.

And that mythical task, ladies and gentlemen, is the act of guiding Summer to do her school work.

Terming it as school work is probably pushing it a little, given that it is only 2 pages of alphabet writing from her weekly I Can Read class.

Times I guided her on her work: 3
Times she ended up crying: 3

Which is sort of a perfect record not to be proud of.

Honestly I don’t understand why she doesn’t understand the logic of ‘get it over and done with’ and insist on dilly dallying her way through.

‘Papa see my ‘i’ is like a lollipop!’
‘I write my ‘l’ like a worm!’

Seriously, such statements are only funny the first time round, and not when you have to write 30 times of the same alphabet.

As much as I tried to control, I always end up being too harsh on her.

Oh well, now we know which parent is going to jaga the kids’ school work next time.

Hint: it’s not me.

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Additional hint: it's the woman 2nd from the left

A Note To All Irresponsible Parents

I have always defined irresponsible parents as those who prioritise their needs over their kids and end up not taking good care of them.

We all know of someone like that, be it friends or family, because unfortunately it is now more prevalent than before.

Parents who deposit their kids with helpers or grandparents while they go out for dinners/drinks/shopping every night.

Parents who during weekends stuff their kids with the iPad to keep them entertained so that they don’t have to entertain the kids themselves.

Parents who go for holidays themselves 2 to 3 times per year yet have never ever brought their kids overseas before.

To be fair I have gone out with Mama Toh alone for a couple of nights before, and have gone for one 3D2N trip without our kid (back then it was just Summer), we were swiftly struck with guilt and quickly promised each other not to do it again.

I guess going out alone once in a while for a quick dinner is fine, but once it happens on a regular occurrence that is just being irresponsible.

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This is usually how we spend out nights

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Just the way we like it

Anyhow in these cases, the victims are their own kids, which to put it bluntly and slightly selfishly, their actions do not affect me or anyone else. The only people who suffer are their kids.

What has shocked even myself, is the discovery that there is a second group of parents who can also be branded irresponsible, albeit with a different meaning.

So Mama Toh has this acquaintance who is apparently… bringing her kid overseas for a holiday despite him being diagnosed with HFMD (hand foot mouth disease, for the uninitiated) two days ago.

WHAT. IN. THE. WORLD.

These parents, whilst caring for the kids by not leaving them alone at home and going for their holiday themselves, put other kids in danger of contacting HFMD. Hence the different meaning of irresponsibility.

Different amalgamations, same morally-lacking actions nonetheless.

To me, this is pretty much akin to escaping from quarantine when you have SARS, or spreading HIV to your partner who has no knowledge. Ok the disparity in severity is there but the gist is the same.

Parents, spare the rest of us some thought. How would YOU feel if your kid caught HFMD from another kid who was supposed to be quarantined?

Would you be saying ‘Ayah it’s ok la, the doctor also didn’t say the boy cannot go out what.’

Which is what Mama Toh’s acquaintance said when trying to validate her decision to bring her kid overseas.

Maybe… the doctor assumed you have common sense? Which apparently isn’t too common now.

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You ought to be shot

An Overdue Trip To The Zoo

On Saturday we finally went to the Zoo, something we have been wanting to do for the longest time. The last time we went there as a family was when Summer was slightly under 2 years old, and at that age she wasn’t that engaged and fascinated by animals.

We’ve been planning another trip since then, but seemingly have always had our plans postponed for various reasons.

By the haze, weather, Mama Toh’s pregnancy, Zavier’s birth, one of the kids falling sick, both of the kids falling sick, Summer’s I Can Read class… You get the idea.

So the stars aligned last Saturday and we trotted to the Zoo with my parents!

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Happy grandparents and grandkids

My parents have always claimed to want to ‘take a break from taking care of the grandkids’ on weekends but I know deep down they enjoy spending time with them. Just look at their happy faces above.

Making the trip down to the Zoo must have been one of the best decisions on how to spend a weekend morning.

My parents enjoyed walking the long paths as part of their exercise, Summer couldn’t stop fawning over all the animals, Zavier cooed over the monkeys and turtles, and Mama Toh… well I was just thankful that she didn’t complain about the sun and heat. That is a very rare feat.

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Before we were all drenched in sweat

It’s really quite worth the money if you purchase the tickets online from the Zoo’s website prior to your visit. You can save up to 25%… or more if you are over 60 years old and qualify as a senior citizen. Like my Dad.

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The eldest and the youngest, 60 years apart

Some other select photos…

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Exploration in progress

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Zavier boy airing his pits

And the highlight of the day, given how much Summer is obsessed about My Little Pony… riding a real pony is really a big deal for her.

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Dream fulfilled

But of course Mama Toh swiftly brought her back to reality from her euphoric experience by anxiously commenting right after the ride…

Did you pat the pony? Yes?? Quick use wet tissue to clean your hands now!

Classic Mama Toh.

A Salute To All Mothers

We had a great 4 day weekend packed with fun, which has now unfortunately come to an end. Well actually the 4 day weekend only applied to myself and Mama Toh, given that Summer still went to school on Thursday and Friday and well, Zavier’s current life is just a perpetual weekend.

1. Movie Time!
Young parents will probably reminisce about the times when we can go for a movie every weekend, or even sneak in a late night movie on a weekday. That has now changed with kids. Weekends are fully for kids, while leaving your kids at home at night to watch a movie on weekdays sounds quite irresponsible…

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Some rare couple time

So Mama Toh and I have only managed to catch movies whenever we are on leave. Our first movie since forever was Captain America: Civil War and we decided to splurge on a Gold Class experience, given that I do not see us back at the cinema anytime soon in the foreseeable future.

Okay movie, good seats, great company.

2. Summer’s Birthday
The main reason why we took 2 days of leave from work was to celebrate Summer’s birthday at her school, something she has been looking forward to for the past few months.

Her current craze revolves around My Little Pony, so she has been bugging for a themed celebration this time. And like any other responsible parent determined not to spoil their kids, we gave in to her wishes. Hey, it’s her birthday.

So there was a My Little Pony birthday cake…

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Whoever has such a monstrosity as a birthday cake at 4 years old?

And a My Little Pony family outfit…

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Which I hope I never have to wear again

And My Little Pony gift bags…

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Which everyone was excited about

At that point in time I thought I was going to faint either from My Little Pony overdose, or from the saccharine sweet cake. Which makes me wonder if the kids at school have always been so chatty and active, or if they became hyperactive after eating the super sugar coated cake. Sorry, teachers.

3. The Kids’ First Pseudo BBQ
Well not the real outdoor kind, because Mama Toh would have complained endlessly about the heat, smoke and possible mosquitoes. Instead, we brought the kids to Gyu Kaku for a small scale Mother’s Day dinner for the 4 of us.

While the kids didn’t know how to enjoy marbled Wagyu like we did, the cooking process kept them entertained most of the time.

‘Papa cook again! I want to see the smoke and fire!’

And little Zavier was just preoccupied trying to catch all the smoke on top of his head.

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Happy bellies, happy family

4. Mothers’ Day
As Mama Toh and myself are quite family-oriented people, it is quite natural for us to spend Mother’s Day with our families.

Lunch was with my in-laws, where my mother-in-law has always played an integral part of the family, and my sisters-in-laws act as pseudo-mothers to my kids every weekend (but only when my kids are on a pleasant, approachable, non-pooping behavior).

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Summer's 2nd best friend


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Look at that booger on Zavier's nose

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My happy in-laws

Dinner was with my family, which I disastrously tried to cook for them. Unfortunately no photos as I was busy… but all was not lost as I learnt 2 very vital lessons:

1. Da bao-ing food is actually not too bad an idea.

2. My dad cannot fry an egg, despite being an Engineer.

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Already looking forward to the next weekend!

A Family Celebration For Summer

So over the Labor Day long weekend we had a little lunch with our 2 families (Mama Toh’s and mine) for an advanced birthday celebration for Summer.

Received a very pleasant surprise in the form of the below video which shows a compressed chronicle of the whole lunch. Thanks Chee Yao!

Thanks also for now making me lose sleep on whether I should buy a GoPro myself.

MEGA thanks also for putting in Summer’s current favourite song in the video, which I managed to forget about for a good 10 seconds until I played this video. My ears are bleeding as I type this.

I have stated several times before to some friends that when it comes to parents and in-laws, I am one of the luckiest persons around.

Simply because my family and in-laws have no qualms hanging out together regularly.

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In fact, my in-laws see my parents almost daily given that they are the ones who kindly offered to pick Summer up daily from school to my parents house. Travelling 20 minutes to fetch their grand-daughter for a 2 minute trip daily is an amazing thing to do which myself and Mama Toh are always thankful for.

And my parents who have to take care of Zavier full time until he goes to school deserves praise as well. A day handling little Zavier probably burns you more calories than going to the gym. Totally serious here.

Anyway back to Summer.

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Can you believe this was 2 years ago?

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And now?

Where did time disappear to?

 

A Testy Friday Morning

This morning, for some unfathomable reason, Mama Toh decided that she wanted to bring a cutesy My Melody water bottle to work.

To be fair, this bottle was hers but almost never been used before in the 1+ year or so it has been in our house.

So when she filled up the bottle and tried to suck it up the water via the straw, it failed and got Mama Toh slightly jumpy in the morning.

I took a look and realized the straw was slightly flattened due to extensive under-usage (what an oxymoron) and proceeded to give it a little squeeze which solved the problem, unknown to Mama Toh at that time since she was busy changing for Zavier.

For some unfathomable reason again, Summer decided that she wanted to take up the challenge of drinking from a stuck bottle.

After I rectified it, it was quite obvious that she was going to succeed in her self imposed challenge.

Summer: Can drink what! You see!

Me: Ya, then why Mama cannot?

Summer (in all seriousness): I think maybe she too old. Cannot use My Melody bottle, that’s why. I young so I can.

Indeed, she has my genes.

Happy long weekend everyone!

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Pardon my smooth, exposed shoulder

A Post Dedicated To Zavier

I was just mentioning to Mama Toh over the weekend that most of our social media posts revolved around Summer, and when I browsed my phone’s gallery the ratio of Summer’s photos to Zavier’s photos was easily 3:1.

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Give me some love!

Which led me to feel a pang of guilt towards Zavier.

Not that we don’t love him as much, but well, Zavier is at the age where he is inquisitive about everything, plus learning to walk unsupported, and fortunately for him (and probably less so for us), is blessed with a supply of energy which never seems to run dry. Plus having an elder sister who craves attention slightly too frequently when being left on her own.

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Rare times when both kids sit down together

Which means that when we are with Zavier, we are mostly:

– Looking out for him in case he falls or climbs up somewhere he is not allowed to. Like up the sofa and hanging onto the window grills. Which he totally did a few times to our utmost horror.

– Watching him in case he puts something he picks up from the floor into his mouth. Which is almost a regular occurrence. Tissue paper is becoming one of his favourite snacks.

– Putting back in place whatever he walked past and fancied… and threw on the floor before proceeding to his next new interest. This happens almost every 30 minutes when we are at home.

– Responding to Summer’s cries of ‘Papa come!’ whenever I try to spend some time alone with Zavier boy.

As you can see, all these scenarios do not really allow us the time to take a step back and snap good photos of Zavier.

Whenever it happens, photos usually turn out like that…

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Does he take caffeine throughout the day?

But nonetheless, this doesn’t diminish the love with have for him! To commemorate our love for him, I will overload you with his photos.

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Err.. I love pink unicorns!

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And cooking!

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Rare second sitting still

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Sexy pose moment

Please learn how to sit back and relax Zavier! It’s one of the best things to do in life!

A Homebound Weekend

Following the paediatrician’s stern warning on bringing our kids out on the weekend for fear of catching any virus again (especially for Zavier), we decided to have a 100% homebound weekend.

Which of course was a decision me and the kids cheered for, while Mama Toh to perennial weekend shopper begrudgingly accepted. You can pretty much tell the home dynamics here.

We cheated a little, when I allowed Summer to follow me out for an hour or so to buy groceries for the week.

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Ok... groceries and to have breakfast

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Summer's breakfast after changing her mind 3 times on where to sit

A whole weekend at home poses 2 challenges to myself:

1. How to keep the kids entertained.
2. How to avoid Mama Toh from grousing about being stuck at home.

Whilst I had some idea on how to keep the kids occupied, Mama Toh was actually my bigger worry, given that she had already shown some signs of PMS before the weekend.

‘Tsk cannot go out. Sian.’
‘You better entertain the kids ah.’
‘Tsk going to be so hot. Better on aircon in the living room ah.’

My plan with her was to take it a step at a time.

So for the kids…

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So adventurous! Not.

I brought the kids camping! Right smack in our study room! With aircon blasting in case they get too hot!

Ok I see all your judgemental eyes mocking me for over-sheltering my kids too much by choosing an indoor campsite. But hey, in my defence my kids are only under 4 years old… and it was really a very very hot day outside. Surely that deserves some slack?

Ok damn it, I am an over protective Dad.

Next up on the list was Summer’s favourite activity – cooking.

The main dish was a one-pot easy tomato rice where we just dumped various ingredients into the rice cooker and waited for the output. Not sure if we added too much water but the end state was rather risotto-y, which surprisingly went down well with both kids.

Looking to clear out the leftover potatoes from last week, I cut them up and utilizing our ever reliable airfryer, we made everyone’s favourite snack…

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Nobody can resist french fries. Even if they come without oil and salt.

Summer was amazed that for the first time in her life, we didn’t have to visit MacDonald’s to get fries. Which she probably postulated that that means we can make them at home every single day.

‘Can we make fries tomorrow too?’
‘Nope’
Sulk.

Anyhow following the very eventful morning/early afternoon, we binged on a few episodes of cartoon and the kids fell into deep slumber. Yes, eating fries and watching cartoon in an air-conditioned tent is more physically taxing than I thought.

And what about Mama Toh?

With the kids busy and eventually sleeping, Mama Toh was (fortunately for me) able to enjoy quite a relaxing day at home, sneaking in a long nap herself.

Busy/tired kids = Relaxed wife = Relieved Dad

That must be the Holy Grail of how our family operates.

5 Conclusions From The Weekend

1. Summer managed to hold her own weight at her new I Can Read class with the older kids!

Initially whining in the morning that she didn’t want to go (quite understandable if you ask me), the teacher commented after the end of her class that she was quite strong in her understanding and very enthusiastic in class.

Of course, the lollipop which I promised she would get after her class might have helped a bit…

2. Harry’s has amazingly tasty and amazingly priced nachos.

I already told Mama Toh in advance that whilst waiting for Summer’s class to end, I will park myself at Harry’s for a beer. When she hears beer she will usually grouse but this time, surprisingly she wanted in as well… And we shared what was probably one of the nicest nachos we have ever eaten.

For a princely $16.

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Even Zavier cannot believe the price of these nachos

3. 10 a.m. is definitely not the time to go to open parks. No matter how much your kids enjoy it.

Yes, we made a big mistake to going to Gardens By The Bay in the sweltering heat. I think I started sweating right after we parked the cars.

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Not giving a damn about the heat here

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Or here

Mega demerit points awarded to Mama Toh who dressed Summer up in long sleeves and long leggings for the trip. She must have lost at least 2kg from the one hour we were there.

4. Zavier seems to prefer walking to being carried now.

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Mama Toh wearing a carrier as an accessory

Luckily for us, as Zavier is about 10 kg now, that he seems to prefer walking than being carried (mostly by Mama Toh).

Still alot of room for improvement based on his shaky steps but hey, it’s a start. I credit the noisy squeaky shoes Mama Toh bought for him for being the catalyst in this.

Now if only those shoes exuded music with each step instead that would be great.

5. Kallang Wave Mall is quite awesome.

We have been to Kallang Wave a couple of times now, but have only ventured within the mall itself, which honestly wasn’t too impressive given the choice of stores.

However, this time round, we actually went out of the mall, and it was actually a whole new world out there.

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Ample space to scoot

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And an amazing train which travels the exterior of the mall

Highlight of course was the train, which costs $6 per kid/adult over 90cm tall. Summer has been bugging to sit it again everyday since we went there, so I guess it won’t be too long until we return to Kallang Wave!

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