A very prosperous Lunar New Year to all!

Usually I wouldn’t be typing such sentences given that it seems like I am speaking to myself, but looking at the view statistics from the past few weeks, I am quite surprised that the number of readers have reached beyond my initial expectations, which is a grand total of 2. Me and Mama Toh.

Gong Xi Fa Cai!

Without getting into the usual schedule of where we went over the 2 days, a big part of me and Mama Toh’s conversation revolved around reminiscing about how our Lunar New Year was spent last year.

For those who don’t know, Zavier was born right smack on the very first day of Lunar New Year 2015. (Luckily not the first of the day, I would never agree to go on TV for an interview over such a bo liao milestone.)

So a year ago, after having our annual reunion dinner and putting Summer to sleep, me and Mama Toh were just chilling in bed making jokes about how funny it would be if Zavier were to come out tomorrow (at this point there was still a week to go before the EDD given by the doctor). This talk led us to ordering a McDonald’s delivery at midnight… You know just in case Mama Toh can’t eat it for the next month on confinement.

And just in case it was. At the best/worst possible time, Mama Toh started to have contractions at about 8 a.m. on the first day of Lunar New Year. Being the self-conscious woman that she has always been, Mama Toh insisted that we changed into our brand new New Year clothes before checking into the hospital.

But not before leaving Summer behind with her grandparents, which was probably the most heart-breaking thing at that period.

(R) All decked out to send Summer to her grandparents, (L) 30 minutes later in the delivery ward

Thinking back, up until now I feel pangs of guilt for leaving Summer alone (well there were loads of relatives playing with her… But it’s not the same) over the entire New Year period.

And whilst I took Mama Toh’s advice (more like orders) of wearing long pants, a shirt and shoes to the hospital, it wasn’t long before she was asked to change out into her airy, thin hospital gown, and I was stuck for an unknown number of hours too formally dressed for a hospital delivery.

Cardinal Rule alert: Always wear comfortable clothing when preparing for delivery.

Thankfully, like his sister before him, Zavier only took about 5 hours to see the world for the first time.

Ayoh so cute and small

Those 2 days passed in a flash, we didn’t have many visitors probably because many were out visiting, or find it inauspicious to visit a hospital during the New Year. Not that we minded though, we were more than happy to have undisturbed rest.

And then there was Summer, who visited daily but wailed uncontrollably when asked to leave the hospital.

Oh well, glad that we are one happy family this New Year!

With the Lee family

And then the Tohs

To a happy, healthy and prosperous New Year ahead!

We held a birthday party for little Zavier boy over the weekend at Five Square. Well technically his birthday doesn’t come until 19 February but with the Chinese New Year festivities looming we just decided to bring it forward to everyone’s convenience.

All dressed up for the party

Five Square, in case you have not patronised it before, is an amazing place to bring your kids to on Saturdays. Good food, no crowd, and an array of activities to keep your kids entertained for hours (free of charge!). Throw in a good list of draft beers on tap and it has got to be one of the best ways to pass a Saturday afternoon.

Actually, if not for the fact that I am writing this post about Zavier’s party, I would have kept mum in an effort to maintain the crowd-less status quo of the place.

I guess everyone enjoyed the party, given that it must have been one of the very few one year old parties to provide free flow beer. As the person who ordered the multiple towers of beer, I blame it on the sweltering weather.

Guess who enjoyed the party the most thought?

No prizes for guessing.

Mama Toh came up with the theme of Avengers, not because Zavier actually likes the Avengers (worryingly he seems to prefer My Little Pony for now, thanks to Summer’s constant influence), but because Mama Toh saw a nice Avengers cake and decided to just go with it. Now you know who’s boss.

Not sure how many pints of beer I consumed to result in such a face

Speaking of the Avengers, I had a quick thought as to who would be an apt Avengers alter ego within the family.

Papa Toh: Captain America. Old uncle mentality stuck in a young body. Plus dashing good looks.

Mama Toh: Iron Man. De facto leader, wears the pants in the house. Prone to sudden anger outbursts when provoked.

Summer: Hulk. Lovable when in a good mood, uncontrollable when angry.

Zavier: Hawkeye. Generally peace-loving and low profile, has a 100% accuracy level in locating small objects to put in his mouth.

2 nights ago, on the 26th February 2016, we recorded yet another first.

The first homework, or project, as the childcare centre elegantly puts it.

For a kid yet to celebrate her 4th birthday.

But in all fairness to the centre, it did achieve its intention of getting the kid to bond with their parents via a simple task of building a photo frame out of recycled products together. This was what they wrote in the communication book, dated 20th February, indicating that the completed project needs to be submitted on 27th February.

And we only read the note on 26th February, 8.30 p.m. As what Mama Toh often terms us, Worst Parents Ever.

What followed thereafter was a 30 minute mad rush trying to scour the house for the necessary items and putting them altogether, while simultaneously screaming at a crawling Zavier not to rip apart what we have put together, and at the same time nagging at Summer not to be distracted with her plethora of toys and be focused on her project.

After 30 minutes, it was all worth it.

She probably did 20% of the work

All good and done, and looking forward to the next project!

Mental note to self: check communication book daily to avoid last minute mad rushes.

23 January 2016.

Just slightly over an hour ago, we celebrated yet another milestone for our daughter. In case you were wondering, yes it is still possible to achieve milestones well into toddler age (if you, like us, celebrate every small achievement), for example today.

Today marks the day Summer… Used a public toilet for the first time today! And to mark this achievement, she decided to triumphantly take a dump while at it.

Yes, she defecated in a public toilet. At Square Two, Level 4, Cubicle 2. Ok I was just kidding about Cubicle 2 since I wasn’t the one who brought her in.

I can only imagine her triumphant face looking like that

Whilst this is a major achievement for all parents working towards moving their kids entirely off diapers, I have to admit that it could have occurred earlier than today, if we weren’t so lazy/paranoid.

The fact is, Summer had actually requested several times before to not wear diapers anymore. But due to the following reasons, we rejected her requests and were resistant to wean her off. Diaper weaning, if there is ever this term.

1. Bad experience from waking up half soaked in pee. Us, and summer (sans-diaper). The first and only time we tried night weaning.

2. Bad experience from being told last minute about her need to pee/poo. When we hear ‘Papa Mama I need to shee-shee! (apologies for baby talk here)’, it is usually just a 1 minute or so warning before she loses control. In most times, 1 minute is never enough to find and walk to a public toilet.

3. Bad experience on the hygiene level of public toilets. I guess this doesn’t need much explanation. We all have this experience.

Hence the apprehension.

Whatever got into us to let her try today, I can’t say for sure, but I’m glad we tried it, and rather successfully at that.

Sometimes, it’s just about leaving the excuses behind.

Whilst I can probably bombard this blog with enough photos from our Bali trip to make a full length movie, I will only put up a few, and instead spend more time on reflecting about the trip.

1. Super thankful that both sides of the family get along well. When was the last time you heard of a family being close to their in-laws? Well, my family and Mama Toh’s just went on our 3rd holiday together.

Families that travel together stay together

2. Super thankful that everyone loves taking care of the kids. Or at least doesn’t mind taking care. We probably would have gone crazy if we had just travelled alone, the 4 of us.

Case in point: Neither of the below carrying my kids were me.

3. Middle-aged folks do not like Bali. There is nothing for them to do except…

Nonetheless, still a great holiday for family bonding. Here’s to many many more to come!

After a short hiatus, we’re now back to sunny Singapore! All the way from sunny Bali!

Terribly burnt, terribly dreading the back-to-work feeling, but (mainly) terribly happy.

Well, for starters, we stayed at a place reminiscent of the Istana.

Seriously, this is only half of the backyard

I guess this is the closest we can get to experiencing the Istana life, unless of course, one of my kids becomes the future President.

Will be posting up a more detailed entry about the trip itself, but for now… here’s all of us with a mandatory shot where nobody can really look/smile properly at the camera.

Important: TerribleTohs is now on Instagram!

Summer: Papa, you must work hard and earn a lot of money!

Me (bewildered): Sure, what do I need the money for?

Summer: So that you can give me!

Me (slightly irritated): For what?

Summer: So that I can buy a present for you!

Me (happy and slightly guilty for my earlier irritation): Wow, what are you going to buy for Papa?

Summer: Some 大便!

Me (emotionless): Close your eyes and go and sleep now.

Just another unpredictable 15 seconds in the journey of parenthood.

Brace yourselves, the holiday season has finally run its course.

As I type this on the early morning of 4th January 2016, thousands of blurry-eyed students should be preparing (some eagerly, some with dread) for the first day of school. Another thousands of parents (all eagerly) will most probably also be frantically re-checking their kids’ school bags, preparing breakfast, and for those with kids going on the first day of Primary School – you are probably going through your self-made checklist of 12,000 items for the first day of school.

And that will be my exact scenario in 3 years.

For now I will enjoy the cherubic state of my kids and the simplicity that comes with it.

Anyhow, inspired by a book I just completed (here if anyone is interested), I decided on a whim yesterday that I will NOT be bringing in my mobile phone to the bedroom after 9 p.m., when the kids are just preparing for bed.

I have always been guilty of over-checking my phone – stemming from my previous job where emails and WhatsApp messages ran late into the night, but ever since I switched jobs the bad habit still remained, but emails/WhatsApp were replaced by Facebook and soccer news.

And I have always rationalised it by convincing myself that it was a ruse to ‘ignore’ my kids while they prepare to fall asleep. That is, rephrasing it in my view, Papa is busy – time to stop talking and go to sleep. While it usually works, a part of me is usually eaten up by guilt. What if my kids just want to tell me about their dreams and how their day went? Am I shutting them out when I check Facebook for the 5th time in 2 hours?

So I went phone-less last night.

And like all scientific/social experiments, results are only valid after a large enough sample size, so I can only comment conclusively after a month or so. But based on last night’s experience, whilst it took longer for the kids to fall asleep, Summer suddenly confided in us that she cannot wait to go to Primary School (whoever wants to enter the stress-cycle asap?!), and that makes it all worth it –  to be there as a listening ear for your kids when they need you.

As an added bonus, mega phone-addict Mama Toh also decided to go without her phone for the night. It was a good night.

I guess the purpose of this blog, like many other family-oriented blogs out there, starts out as an avenue for parents like myself to journal memories and milestones of one’s family, especially with young kids in tow, so that somewhere down the road when the kids have reached peak adolescence and deem us as uncool old farts, me and my wife can still fire up this blog to reminisce about the good old days.

You know, times when these adolescents were once babies who cried every 2 hours asking to be fed, carried or for no reason at all; times when it took 1 hour (including that mandatory 45 minutes required to chase them around the house with a spoon) to feed them dinner; times when we wished our kids stopped asking ‘Why’ for the 2,156th time of the day so that we can have that mythical 1 minute of peace.

Yes, those times will end as every year passes before our eyes. And in time to come the tables will be turned on us.

We will be calling our kids every 2 hours asking if they are hungry or need anything at all.
We will be silently praying that family meals last a little longer than the 5 minutes that teenagers wolf down their food in.
We will be hoping our kids never stop talking to us. Peace is overrated.

As 2016 dawns upon us, let us reflect back on the past year and look forward to the next one.

Work hard, play hard, live a healthy and happy life, and most importantly, love your family.

Happy New Year!